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The Eighties have been a wild time of shiny and daring trend, wacky haircuts, New Wave music, and a few very questionable meals — particularly when it got here to snacks, desserts, and drinks. However, youngsters and adults alike devoured these merchandise, dad and mom really purchased them for his or her little ones, and we have been all nonetheless stunned after they disappeared from retailer cabinets. Listed below are 12 meals & drinks from the ‘80s we are able to’t consider we consumed.
Huge League Chew
“I can’t consider folks used to present their youngsters sweet cigarettes,” mentioned dad and mom within the Eighties — the identical ones who purchased their youngsters Huge League Chew, a wide range of gum that was shredded into strips to resemble chewing tobacco. And naturally we, the youngsters, packed our cheeks with it in an effort to appear like our favourite ballplayers. Looking back, we’re stunned we have been allowed to eat this sweet created in 1980…and are much more shocked that Huge League Chew stays available on the market right now!
Bonkers
Nabisco debuted a candy within the ‘80s known as Bonkers, which have been marketed as chewable candies containing a fruity heart. Our problem isn’t with the “fruity” label (although the candies consisted of no precise fruit), however as a substitute the phrase “chewable.” Sadly, Bonkers shortly hardened into rock-solid lots able to breaking a tooth — particularly a tooth that has been weakened from years of sugar consumption.
Handi-Snacks
Folks give guff to Lunchables for being unhealthy, however at the least that cheese-and-cracker product (invented in 1985) used precise slices of cheese. Earlier than that, all we had have been Handi-Snacks, which debuted in 1980 and inspired you to unfold a semi-gelatinous cheese product onto fragile crackers with a plastic stick. Handi-Snacks nonetheless exist, however the firm did away with the sticks years in the past…for environmental causes, not as a result of some youngsters used to faux they have been cigarettes and run round with them of their mouths. (It’s us. We have been the youngsters.)
Hello-C Ecto Cooler
In 1989, Hello-C launched a Ghostbusters-inspired taste known as “Ecto Cooler.” As youngsters, we didn’t know this selection was only a rebrand of the “Citrus Cooler” selection, and assumed as a result of the packaging featured a picture of Slimer from Ghostbusters, that it was in some way slime-
flavored…or ghost-flavored. Regardless, we eagerly gulped down field after field of the intense inexperienced, fruit-flavored drink.
Hostess Pudding Pies
Hostess was by no means large on desserts requiring utensils, which is why they rolled out a pudding product you may eat together with your arms in 1986. (To maintain the expertise neat, the pudding was wrapped in a skinny pastry shell and coated in chocolate.) The dessert’s slogan was “Pudding Energy!” however the one factor this 520-calorie bomb gave us the facility to do was instantly take a nap.
Sizzling Pockets
There’s an countless variety of jokes to be made about Sizzling Pockets (comic Jim Gaffigan has an entire routine constructed round them), however the pizza-packed pastries really comprise premium meats, actual cheese, from-scratch sauce, and fresh-baked bread. Nonetheless, these elements happened after recipe revamps in 2013 and 2015, and the standard of the unique 1983 variations have been rather more questionable. Followers declare the OG HPs really tasted higher, however they burned off our style buds years in the past, so we are able to’t inform the distinction.
Hubba Bubba Soda
Wrigley’s rolled out the Hubba Bubba bubble gum model in 1979 and debuted its now-signature product, Bubble Tape, in 1988 — however earlier than that got here Hubba Bubba Soda, a drink completely nobody requested for (besides possibly dentists on the lookout for extra clients). Not solely was it shiny pink, like carbonated Pepto-Bismol, however the dietary info have been a thriller, as labels weren’t required till the ‘90s. However if you happen to have been involved in regards to the caloric content material, worry not, as Wrigley’s additionally launched a Weight loss program Hubba Bubba Soda.
Jolt Cola
Earlier than power drinks turned the norm, we had Jolt Cola, a super-caffeinated soda created by C.J. Rapp in 1985. Regardless of a slogan that now seems like a warning (“All of the sugar and twice the caffeine!”) and a pervasive city legend a couple of child dying after ingesting the soda, Jolt discovered recognition within the late ‘80s and early ‘90s. It was discontinued in 2011 however returned with an “power drink” rebrand in 2017.
Pop Rocks
Pop Rocks have a turbulent historical past. Within the early ‘80s, just some years after the fizzy sweet powder debuted, rumors popped up purporting the product might trigger stomachs to boil — with one other well-known city legend claiming that Mikey, the Life Cereal spokeskid, died after combining the sweet with soda. That fantasy didn’t scare away sufficient youngsters, so Normal Meals discontinued Pop Rocks in 1983. (They later returned to retailer cabinets within the ‘90s.)
Raisins
There’s nothing fallacious with raisins — they’re each tasty and nutritious — however we’re stunned we ate them as youngsters after being subjected to the California Raisin Advisory Board’s advert marketing campaign that launched in 1986. The commercials featured a fictional claymation band of anthropomorphic dried grapes known as The California Raisins, who carried out R&B covers of basic songs like “I Heard It By the Grapevine.” The primitive claymation was extremely creepy, particularly for younger viewers, however the marketing campaign ended up being successful and lasted greater than 15 years, finally getting retired in 2002.
Squeezits
Squeezeits have been at all times a questionable buy, and never simply because the identify is means too near “squeeze zits.” Launched in 1985, the “fruit-flavored juice” was largely excessive fructose corn syrup, and due to its distinctive bottle design that needed to be compressed so as to eat its contents (and weren’t resealable), they have been by no means actually empty and continually leaking in all places. And in case you wanted a reminder that Squeezits have been nearer to sweet than juice, the corporate as soon as did a crossover with Life Savers.
Tidal Wave Bubble Gum
Have you ever ever bitten into a chunk of gum and thought, “That is nice, however I want it could squirt unusual, fruit-flavored liquid into my mouth”? In that case, Tidal Wave Bubble Gum could be for you. These chews got here in a lot of flavors, together with Chargin’ Cherry, Strawberry Surf, Gushing Grape, and Oceans of Orange.
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